Love Lost
by vampireninja09
Summary: Rose is in a coma and she doesn't know why. How much time has passed and who is the man that constantly was by her bedside this whole time? She wants to remember her past, why things happened, and if someone is trying to hurt her. Things don't make sense, and how did she end up in a coma. Why can't she remember?
1. Chapter 1: Prologue

Chapter 1: Prologue

I am always dreaming. Dreaming of me running in a field, dreaming of me escaping, dreaming of me existing beyond this world. Countless of times I am running in a field. The field is beautiful, long, vast, and flowery. As much as I want to escape it, I also want to stay. Breathing in the scent of the flowers, it looks like it could be safe for me. It looks like somewhere I could stay. Something inside me tells me that I should run, that I shouldn't stay, and that it isn't safe. Every time I turn my head there always is this lurking shadow behind me, but it never gets close enough to harm me. It scares me and makes me wonder at the same time.

This seems to be my endless fate. I don't know how I realized that I was in a coma, but somehow I managed to figure it all out, piece it all together, wrap my mind all around it. I remember before I entered this coma, a teacher of mine telling me that when you are in a coma, it's a peaceful environment. You exist like you would if you were not in one, and you live your life normally. This doesn't seem like this normal to be, but what can I say? There is really no option for me to protest, to complain, or ask questions. I'm stick here in this vortex, repetitive place all day, everyday. I can't leave, and I'm forced to replay this scenario. I thought everything would be peaceful, but apparently that's not the way things go. All I know is that I'm not awake, that I'm in a coma, and I don't remember why.

My memories inside here are fuzzy. The life I seemed to live before this barely exists. I remember my family vividly, my friends, my school, and that's it. It makes me wonder how I ended up here, and if this will be my demise. Do you really die if you die in a coma? That's another question that is constantly in my thoughts. I'm scared that I will and I won't get the answers I crave to seek.

A memory that constantly stands out to me was the time I was fighting with my mother before all of "this" happened. She was telling me that I needed to get my grades up, and I needed to quit drinking. I'll admit, I could have stopped the drinking. I was being defiant, and was acting out because my parents were getting a divorce and it was working. It was setting my mom on edge and I liked that. The plan was working. A few times my dad even had to come get me because I was too drunk to drive home. His lectures didn't faze me. He cheated on my mom and to me that was unforgivable. I could barely even stomach to be in the same room as him. What right did he have to lecture me? I barely even see him, and that's the way I like it. If he only calls once a week, and I only see him once a month, he has no right to act like a parent now. If mom hadn't been working, I would have asked her to come get me. She was working at the hospital that night, so I was stuck with him.

After I found out that he cheated on my mom, I was in shock. My whole world turned upside down and the room began to spin. My mom didn't even know I was standing on the stairs overhearing her and my dad arguing about the whole thing. She was threatening to divorce him and he was shouting back that he had been wanting to leave her for a while. He had been sleeping with his mistress for two years and had gotten her pregnant. My mom was furious that he got his mistress pregnant and that she was going to leave her for his mistress and their baby.

When I heard the conversation that night, I told myself that I would never speak to my dad again, and that he'd no longer be in my life. Up until my accident, I had been living my life that way for two months. They were peaceful, and lonely too. Sometimes I thought to myself that I should just forgive and that I really missed him. Then when I'd see my mom sleeping on the couch at night after night, clutching their old wedding photograph, the bile and the anger would rise back up in my throat again. She could barely tolerate sleeping in the bed upstairs anymore that they shared. She had pretty much trashed their old room together too. All of his clothes were gone, things he used on a regular basis, and everything that tied him to us was gone too. It was like he no longer existed to us anymore. He was gone and everything else that remained of him, my mom made sure to delete. But, as much as I know she wanted to hate him and how much she tried to reinforce that she hated him, I knew that she still loved him. She still holds onto little trinkets of him. She can't erase him. I doubt she'll ever be able to. To her, he was the love of her life that just slipped away. I know she had to have been replaying every event of their lives together of the past two years, what she did wrong, and what she could have changed. My mother had become a shell thanks to him. That is another thing I cannot forgive him for.

What makes it even worse is that he's living two hours away, happily, with her and there soon to be child and where am I? I'm in a coma that I can't escape. I've told myself to wake up, to exit it, and resume my life I was living. It doesn't seem to be that easy. Something is holding me in here and I can't figure out what. Every day before I enter the field, I tell myself that I'll wake up, I'll leave here and everything will be fine. I don't know how much time has passed while I've been in here, but I know I've been chanting that same mantra for a long time. I still haven't woken up and I'm still here. I'm still running in that field, trying to escape something I don't know what I'm running from.

It's beginning again. The repetitive cycle is starting again. I know that soon I'll have to start running again and I'll succeed in outrunning the shadow. I've thought to myself, what if I just stay where I am with my feet planted firmly on the ground. What if I'm not afraid to move, and I just stay, what will happen? As long as I've been here, I've been working up the courage. Something compels me to move, but at the same time, it compels me to stay. If I stay where I am, will the shadow kill me? Will it fulfill and answer my hopes and questions? Will it be able to free me from this repetitive cycle?

The sun is starting to rise, and there is a slight wind that is rippling through the field inviting me in the direction I'm supposed to be heading. The same familiar breeze is pushing the scent of the flowers right to me. It's a pleasant smell, and I feel the bile beginning to rise up in my throat. When I'm nervous and angry, it seems to be an unfortunate mechanism of my body. I hate it, but it's one of the last things that connects me to what I was like before I entered into here.

As the sun continues to rise and it's bright light and warmth extends across the field, I chant to myself that it's almost time. Today I will stay, today I will get answers, and today I will not be afraid. Today.

It's happening. The shadow is coming across the field, and I can feel my feet turning in the direction it wants to go. My legs and feet are beginning to betray me. They are used to this familiar pattern, they are used to me getting away. I force myself to stay in this position as the shadow grows nearer and nearer.

As the shadows gets closer and closer, I notice the field and the flowers dieing as the shadow comes across it. Why haven't I noticed this before? Was I too caught up that I missed this? Why is everything dieing?

Suddenly, I turn in the direction that I'm supposed to go. I can feel the pads of my feet extending as I begin to launch myself away from the shadow. I don't understand what's going on, and why this is happening. Things are beginning to change. I would have noticed that before when the shadow was coming. Everything has been the same for so long, and the same repetitive cycle that I would have noticed.

"Rose," the shadow whispered as it followed closely behind me in my tracks.

I suddenly felt like stopping. This had never happened before, and as much as I wanted answers, I didn't want to stay. The shadow's one whispered word continue to reverberate and carry through the trees. My name was continuing to linger.

I was nearing the end of the field, and everything would be okay. The cycle would end and everything would restart again. Things would be the same and I wouldn't wonder anymore. There would be no change.

I thought everything would be the same until I felt a an arm grab me from right behind me, and I wake up.


	2. Chapter 2: Awakening

Chapter 2: Awakening

When I first woke up, I felt scared, and unsure. I tried to sit up, but my body was betraying me with fatigue and remained laying down. I could feel my lungs taking in air at a quickened pace as my eyes darted around the room looking for any clues. I knew I was in a hospital, but things felt different. I was trying to take in all of my environment as quickly as I could to try and remember it in case I needed to use it to my advantage. I also needed to find somebody to help clue me in.

"You're awake!" I saw the man look up from the book he was reading quickly and alarmed. As he stood up, things started falling off his lap. So, he started frantically setting things down and trying to wrap his mind around what he should do. His raked his right hand quickly once through his disheveled hair causing it to stand up more in places and look even more messy. He looked like he had slept over here last night. His eyes and face also looked tired like he had barely slept at all.

I kept trying to speak and I heard him cursing to himself and pacing back and forth. He had decided to go get the nurses and the doctor to come see me. I don't know why he didn't go get them right away. What was he hesitating for? What was holding him back?

He turned to look at me one more time, sighing, with a look of relief, agony, and surprise on his face. I didn't know who he was but I felt myself being drawn towards him and attracted to him. My heart was thumping inside my chest as he looked away, and opened the door to go into the hallway.

He didn't speak to me directly, but I felt like I knew who he was and I couldn't remember. He obviously knew who I was, so when he got back, I needed to get some answers to my questions. Maybe my life would make a little sense for a while.

As soon as he got to the nurses station, I saw one of the blonde hair nurses look over at me with sudden alarm shouting at a few people to come in here and to call the doctor back to the hospital. It must be late for him not to be here. I glanced at the clock on the wall and it read two-thirty a.m.

"Damn," I whispered in my mind. This was going to be a big hassle and trouble when he got here. I could feel it.

The blonde hair nurse got off the phone and quickly came in the room with three other people. They quickly proceeded to do some tests, ask how I was feeling, check the monitors, and ask me if I was hungry or thirsty. Everything was happening at a alarming pace, so I just nodded my head. My throat was a little dry so I didn't mind.

I heard one of the nurses whisper to another one that it was unbelievable that I was awake and it was a 'miracle'. To me, that didn't sound like a good sign. I wanted to speak and ask them what they meant, but some for reason, my voice still wouldn't let me speak to them.

With all the nurses running around me and doing their tests, I still managed to see the man sneak back into the room. There was no way I would miss him. There was something about him that made me drawn to him. I had never felt this pull to anyone before. I hadn't even talked to him but I already felt this connection to him. It was strange, scary, and yet exciting at the same time.

One of the nurses finished writing things down and I saw her turn to him and say." You must be very excited that your wife woke up today. I know you've been waiting for it to happen for a very long time. It's such a happy day for you both. I'll call her mother and let her know the good news too."

I was married. When did that happen? I was searching through my memories and could not remember that at all. It must have happened before my accident, but all of those memories were gone to me. I pulled my hand from under the bed, and saw the glistening ring on my finger. I guess I was married after all, but the last memory I could remember was me back in high school.

He glanced at me again with that same look of relief wash over his face. Then I saw another emotion cross over his face. It was a sad look, and yet it looked like it was full of love. It took my breath away. No one had looked at me like that before.

He spoke again to her in a powerful, deep, Russian accent," Yes, it is a wonderful day indeed. You have no idea how long I've waited for this day to happen. Please call her mother and her friend Lissa and let them know the good news."

The nurse nodded one time and left the room. I saw her ushering to the other nurses to leave the room as well. They obviously wanted to give us some privacy.

When the nurses all finally left, I saw him sigh, and run his hand through his hair again. It must be a habit of his when he's exasperated, anxious, or nervous, I quickly noted to myself. He took a seat next to my bed, and just looked at me again before he began to speak.

"Rose, you have no idea how long I've waited for you to wake up. It's unbelievable. I sat here everyday, watching you, wondering how I would react if this moment were to happen. I kept rehearsing in my mind this event, and I kept wishing to myself that today would be the day you opened your eyes and came back to me. Everyday I would wish that, and everyday it wouldn't happen. It finally happened, and I'm so happy. I would look at you and tell you I loved you and I would wait for you as long as I had to. Sometimes the nurses had to pull me away at night because I couldn't leave. I didn't want to miss one moment just in case you woke up. I wanted to be the first person here."

He loves me? I guess that emotion didn't register as big of a shock to me as I thought it would. I was waiting for him to say it, and I loved that he did. We were married after all. I didn't know why I was feeling like this. My emotions were conflicted. I barely knew him after all! How was I feeling like this towards him?! I searched through my emotions wondering if I loved him too.

He looked over and me just waiting for a response in return, but I couldn't give it to him. I didn't know what was wrong, but for some reason, I couldn't speak at all. I put my hand to my throat and tried to show him that I was having a hard time speaking back to him. He took that as a sign that I was thirsty and quickly handed me a glass of water that was sitting, waiting on the bedside table beside me. I took the glass from his hand, and gulped the cold liquid down. I really was thirsty after all. I tried to speak again and it still wasn't working. I tried to motion to him again that I couldn't speak. I put my hands around my throat again and tried to signal that I couldn't speak.

I think he finally realized after a while that I couldn't respond back to him, so he stood up, went to the door again and strode down in large strides to the nurses station. I saw him look back and me and wave with his hands what was going on. The nurse picked up the phone and called the doctor again. I heard her say that all my monitors and tests were fine but I wasn't speaking and wasn't responding to anyone. He must have given her directions because she came back in the room and told me the doctor would be here shortly and if I needed anything from her just to push the blue button that was hanging above my head.

The man walked back in my room and sat down next to me. He somehow had acquired paper and a pen and handed it to me. I felt him put the pen in my hand and the paper in the other. I instantly took it from him and my hands just started writing again as if I had never quit. It felt just as natural to me as it did before my accident. My hand was writing as fast as I could. I was writing down all the questions I wanted to know. How did I get here? Was I in an accident? How long had I been in a coma and how long had we been married before the accident? Where was Lissa and when was my mom going to get here? Was I okay?

I handed him the paper and he scanned the list of questions on the paper. When he looked up, I saw a glimmer of a smile on his face and he looked back down at the paper.

"The first question is 'how did you get here'," he said to me," You got here because you were in a car accident with me, and when we hit the other car, you were ejected from your seat out the windshield. You weren't wearing your seatbelt, Rose. I told you before we left that you should have put it on, but you didn't. You told me things would be okay, and they weren't. You hit your head so hard on the pavement that you were unconscious. I thought you were dead, and tried to do CPR on you until the ambulance came to take you away. You almost died on the way to the hospital because your pulse was so weak. I almost lost you." The look on his face was sad again.

"Your second question to me was 'how long have you been in a coma"," he spoke to me again," You have been in a coma for four years now and we would have been married for five years. Do you not remember me at all or that we were married?" The look one his face was hopeful. He was hoping that I'd say yes and that we could resume our lives just like we did before all of this happened.

I shook my head no and I saw the devastation on face. He couldn't contain it.

"If you don't remember me, what are we going to do?" he said again as he looked out the window.

**A/N: Hi =) Please review and let me know what you think. I deeply appreciate if you would. Btw, I'm looking for a beta reader, so if any of you are interested, let me know through pm. **

**Disclaimer: I don't own the characters or the story itself. I only own the plot. **


	3. Chapter 3: Brazen Beauty

**A/N: Thank you everyone for reading so far! :)  
**

**Disclaimer: I don't own VA as much as I love the story. I purely own this plot! **

Chapter 3: Brazen Beauty

He was looking out the window lost in thought. I wanted to grab his hand, tell him everything was okay, and reassure him. Maybe then he'd let a smile tug at the corners of his mouth again. The last smile he presented to me lit me up inside and made me overwhelmingly happy. I know that he wanted his wife back, I'm sure he had his expectations of what would happen when we woke up, too. Could I fulfill his hopes, and be the person he used to know?

I slowly tried to lean up on the bed, even though my body was aching, my muscles felt sore, and I was exhausted. The creaking of the bed must have alarmed him because he snapped his head towards me and got up to help me up. I felt his hands grab tenderly on my shoulders as he effortlessly lifted me up to a sitting angle. He helped me up quicker than I could have helped myself. I couldn't resist staring at his face. Especially since his face was so close to mine.

"Is that better?" He asked me with one of his eyebrows raised as he asked.

His face was so close to me, and I could smell his hair. I wanted to run my hands through his hair. I nodded my head again. I just wanted to have him sit back down because the smell was beginning to intoxicate me and make me feel dizzy. I needed to get my emotions in check. Just because he was my husband doesn't mean I know anything about him. He knows plenty about me though. The thought made me shudder involuntarily and a blush formed on my cheeks. I was becoming too focused on my thoughts and when I looked back at him, I saw him scan my face once, look at my hair, and then he moved back away to sit down.

"I've always loved your hair ever since we first started dating. It's one of my favorite things about you," he said as another one of his heart melting smiles formed fully across his face.

I felt myself staring wide eyed at him and my hand reach up to my hair to try and feel the condition it was in since I didn't have a mirror. It was probably sticking up all over my head. What is there to love about messy, un-brushed hair sticking straight up and to your head? He still confuses me, but I was going to figure him out. It was one of my own personal missions. If he's my husband, I definitely loved him at one time. I just wanted to regain my memories and remember who he is, and what we used to be.

I started pointing at the table next to him where he had set the pen and paper down. He turned to look at it and handed it back to me. I needed to ask him as many questions as I could before it was time for him to leave. I didn't know why the nurse hadn't kicked him out yet, but either our time was running out soon, my mom and Lissa would get here, or the doctor would finally arrive. It was a race to see which would happen first.

The first question I wrote down was asking him his name. It was something I wanted to know at first but I felt like there were other crucial questions at the time. Now that those had been answered, I felt comfortable asking him other personal questions. He was my husband after all, so I should be allowed to ask them and not be embarrassed. I was slowly beginning to feel like the old me again. I was starting to become more brazen and daring like I used to be. My other questions were how long we had dated before we got married, was my father more involved in my life now, did Lissa still live in town or did she move away, and how old were we now.

I handed him back the paper and I could tell he was prepping himself up for something humorous just like the last time, so I formed a scowl on my face.

"He better not laugh at my questions! They are important," I thought to myself as I began to cross my arms against my chest.

Before he finished reading the questions, he looked up and at me and let out a long, deep laugh. I don't know if it was the look on my face or the way I had my body position, but it must have reminded him of how I used to be. Maybe that was a good sign.

"Roza, you can't be mad at me already," he teased me again," We haven't spoken or seen each other for four years and you're mad at me for snickering before I read your questions?"

I shrugged my shoulders and he smiled back at me. I was more worried about the nickname he called me. Roza. It sounded so familiar to me. It must be something he calls me a regular basis or has called me before. I kind of liked the way it sounded. With his Russian accent, it made it sound endearing and personal.

"On your second set of questions, your first question to me is 'what is your name'," he spoke and looked at me with a serious look on his face," Well the answer is Dimitri Belikov."

I mentally absorbed his name, dissected it, and wrapped my mind around it. Within the first few seconds that he told me his name, I instantly knew that that name fit him. He looked, and sounded like a Dimitri. I just wished I had remembered that on my own and didn't have to ask him. Something that I wished for even more was that I could have spoken to him his name the first few seconds after I woke up. Maybe for a few moments then he could have felt reassured and that everything was going to be okay. It didn't make a difference though with this approach or that approach. As much as I wanted to analyze how the situation could of, would have been different, nothing could of changed about it. This is what happened. Even if I did know this name and he got a few glimmers of hope, he would have been just as shattered when he found out I couldn't remember anything. If he found out that way, it may have been even more heartbreaking to me.

"You are Rose Hathaway or Rose Hathway Belikov, whichever you prefer. You are my wife and you will always be my wife as long as you'll have me. If there ever comes a day when you tell me you don't want me, I'll leave, but until then I'm not going anywhere. I'll never stop fighting for us, or for you to regain your memories of us. If you can't remember, we'll make new memories, and I'll always be by your side."

I could remember my name, but I just wanted to take in everything he was telling me at the time. The look on his face was showing me his true emotions, and how he felt. He wasn't going to give up on us, so I might as well try to fight for us too.

"How long did we date," Dimitri murmured to me," We dated for two years before we got married. When I first met you, I was 25 and you had just turned 19. I was mesmerized instantly from the first time I met you. You were daring, bold, and unafraid to speak your mind and show your actions. You surprised me, angered me, and astounded me all at the same time. I had never met anyone like you; you were an honest, true person. I felt like I could be myself around you since you were always yourself with me."

I wanted to know more about how we met, how he fell in love with me, and what our married life was like. I wanted to know it all.

"And no, sadly, your father wasn't deeply involved in our lives. He wanted to be, Rose, but you wouldn't allow it. I wanted him to be there for you, but since I love you, I listened to what you wanted and never pushed it. You didn't even allow him to be at the wedding."

So my bond to my father still hadn't been repaired. That was nothing new to me. My father expected him to forgive him so easily and it would never happen. I had a hard time forgiving people, and not holding grudges. That quality was actually one I got from him. Our ability to hate and hold grudges was something either of us could let go once someone had hurt us or betrayed us. How could he expect it from me when he couldn't even do it himself? If he wanted my forgiveness, there would be a lot more he'd have to do, and it all started by apologizing to my mother.

Dimitri started to speak again telling me about how Lissa was still in town, how she went to college here even though she could have gone somewhere else. She never left me either. Just the thought of her always being here started to bring tears to my eyes. Apparently, she even came twice a week to visit me, and every once in a while bringing flowers or telling me old stories of us in high school. She never gave up on me either. Dimitri told me about how she was married now to a man named Christian Ozera, and she was pregnant with their first child.

When I formed another scowl on my face about the mention of Christian, Dimitri even reassured me he was a good guy and he was taking care of Lissa. Dimitri apparently instantly knew how that I'd be protective at the mention of anything Lissa. I always will be. She's like a sister to me.

"Finally, your last question to me is regarding to how old we are," he said as he stood to stand up, " I am 31, and you are 26. I imagined by now we'd be on our way to having a child or having another child, but sometimes things don't always turn out the way you plan. Anyways, I'm just glad you're awake and you're back."

I saw him looking in the direction of the nurses station and him looking back at me to gauge my reaction towards them. There were two females standing there asking about where my room was. Finally, my mother and Lissa were here. Even though it was late, I felt so relieved to see them. The two people that were constant support in my life were here. Maybe things would be okay for now.

As soon as the nurses started leading them over to my room, I saw Dimitri walk over to the window and leaned on the edge of it. He must have been moving so my mom or Lissa could sit down when they came in.

All I know is, the next time we were alone, I was going to ask him more about how we met. I glanced over and him just in time to catch him staring at me. Our eyes met for a few moments and the connection between us seemed unbreakable until Lissa came running in squealing.

She came over to my bed and instantly hugged me. I took my eyes off of Dimitri to look at her and hug her back. I really had missed her. I couldn't believe I hadn't talked to her in four years, and I couldn't believe I missed her wedding. The thought of me not being there as she walked down the aisle made my stomach lurch. I had missed something so important.

From now on, I wouldn't miss anything, and I wouldn't leave again. It was a promise I made to myself and fully intended to keep. I wasn't going to leave the people I loved again.


	4. Chapter 4: Mixed Emotions

**Disclaimer: Richelle Mead owns this story, I do not. The plot is purely mine.**

**A/N: Thanks for the reviews I got on chapters 2 and 3. I seriously loved seeing and reading them. Thanks everyone for reading my story! You are all awesome. Also, I'm still on the hunt for a beta reader if anyone is interested…please pm me! : )**

Chapter 4: Mixed Emotions

Lissa was hugging me so tightly, it hurt to breathe. I had to keep taking in big gulps of air, just to keep from being suffocated. I think she forgot that I am injured right now. I looked over at Dimitri and cast him a look of panic, and pointed at her.

"Lissa, I think you're hugging her too tightly. She looks like she can't breathe. Remember she just woke up and she's feeling injured," Dimitri said as he pulled her off of me and started to shake his head at her.

"I'm sorry, Dimitri! I just haven't seen her for so long, it was hard for me to hold back. I've just missed her so much." Her eyes were beginning to shine and glisten, and it looked like tears were beginning to fight from escaping near the corners of her eyes.

"Now you know how I feel," he said as he smirked over at me," But I didn't want to scare her right away, so I didn't touch her. I'm glad I didn't either because she doesn't remember me." Just as quickly as the smirk was on his face, it was gone. He glanced away from me after he said that, maybe he didn't want me to see the sadness in his eyes, or maybe he knew that it would make me angry.

It seemed like he didn't know subtly at all, or either that he couldn't keep anything from people. Two minutes after they walked in the door, he was telling them how I didn't remember him. It was hard for me to believe that he did that. Was this something he did quite often? I was fighting to keep something back of my own, and it was anger. It made me wonder how many more minutes were going to go by before he announced that I woke up not being able to speak. That was going to be a definite bombshell to them. After he announced that I didn't remember him, I was just wishing over and over in my head that the doctor would come in and interrupt us.

I heard Lissa gasp and my mom start to speak," Rose, this is true that you don't remember Dimitri at all?" She whispered right next to me by the bed.

I shook my head yes and looked at her. I didn't know what else I could do since I couldn't change it.

"It's okay. You'll get them back, I know you will. You'll remember him. It'll be hard not too. Once you realize how much you love him, your memories will come back too." Even though something scared or shocked Lissa, she always tried making me feel better and she did. It was what I needed. I didn't need to keep being reminded that I could remember.

Dimitri was over there shaking his head in agreement and my mom began to speak again," What if she never remembers? Will you be okay with that? Will you be willing to start all over again?" She was looking in Dimitri's direction and waiting for his answer.

"You know I will, Janine. I'm not going to leave her. I love her. I told her before that if she never remembered, we would just make new ones. Even if it means starting all over again." He was over by the window again bracing himself on the edge.

His answer looked like it satisfied by mom because she didn't speak anymore about it. My mom looked over at me and smiled. Her hand smoothed over my hair and she told me that she was glad to have me back.

After that, things got a little less awkward and Lissa began to tell me about her and Christian met. To my relief, after she asked why I wasn't speaking, Dimitri quickly diminished her worry and told her I was probably still in shock and having a hard time believing I was wake.

Apparently, Lissa had met Christian her final year of college. She was walking outside of her class when she smacked right into him. At the time, she thought he was a jerk with how he reacted. All of his books had knocked out of his hands, and she was shouting at him that she wasn't looking where she was walking and she couldn't help that it happened. He just yelled at her back that she needed to be watching where she was going. Then he picked up all of his books and walked away. She didn't think she'd ever meet him again.

Then one night after she had gotten off the phone with her mom, she was sitting up in the bleachers where they held their football games. He happened to be walking by with a few friends when he saw her sitting there. He knew that it was the girl from a few days before that he had encountered, but he still stopped to ask her if she was okay. She was surprised that he did stop. Normally people just walk by and don't care what's going on with other people. They keep to themselves. Christian wasn't like that, but it was because of how he was raised. His parents died when he was little, so he was forced to grow up with his aunt who made sure that he treated people decently and with respect. Lissa said that he often thanked his aunt for taking him in because if he had had to grow up in an orphanage, he wouldn't be the same person.

After he stopped and asked her if she was okay, she was shocked and didn't want anything to do with him. She remembered how he treated her the other day, and even threw that at him. He apologized to her, and that surprised Lissa that he would do that, so she began to open up to giving him another chance. After that, they started talking on a regular basis. Sometimes, when she would get back from class, he'd be waiting for her at her dorm. Other times, when they didn't have class, they'd go out of town together. They started out as friends before he asked her to be his girlfriend. He thought they should establish that kind of friendship first before they pursued anything else. Lissa thought that it was stupid at the time because friends usually never become anything more than that. Christian told her to wait and things would be fine.

Three years later, when Christian asked her to marry him, she didn't hesitate to say yes. They had been living together for a year, and she had just gotten her first real life at a newspaper office. She didn't want to start planning the wedding until Rose was out a coma, but she also didn't know how long she would be in one, or if she'd ever wake up.

I couldn't be mad at her. Christian waited for a year and a half after they got married just in hopes that I'd come out of my coma. She wanted me to be her maid of honor, but she chose someone else when it got close to the wedding.

"I want to let you know that I taped the whole thing for you," Dimitri said to me," I thought someday you'd want to see it. I know you couldn't be there, but I also couldn't let you miss it. It only happens once. Whenever you want to see it, just let me know, and I'll bring it for you."

"Rose, that was pretty much the only day he left the hospital since you've been in a coma. It was my wedding, and we practically had to pull the camera away from him because he wanted to capture every detail." Lissa took my hand and squeezed it. I think it was her way of saying that he did that because he truly loved me.

I signaled for him to bring the paper and pencil to me again, and by now he had gotten used to my demands, so he brought it to me.

"What are you doing, Rose? Why can't you say anything?" My mom looked over at Dimitri hoping he'd clue her in.

"I'm not sure why, but she hasn't been able to speak since she woke up," Dimitri sighed," I'm hoping as soon as the doctor gets her, he'll be able to tell us why."

Lissa looked at me, and squeezed my hand again. I looked at her feeling my eyes beginning to pool up with tears and I nodded my head. Hopefully things would be okay. I heard my mom start to cry, so I tried to signal to her that things would work out. She kept on crying until Dimitri went over and put his hand on her shoulder. She grabbed his hand and continued to cry.

I continued writing a note to Dimitri. After I got done, I would write on to my mother too. I didn't need to tell Lissa anything, she just knew. We had always had his unspeakable bond between us. No words needed to be said.

When I finished writing, I managed to catch Dimitri's eyes again, and handed it to him. Then I looked over at Lissa. She knew that I wanted more time alone for a little bit.

"Come on, Janine. Lets go down to the cafeteria for a little while. Maybe that will make you feel better." My mom didn't hesitate to get up. Apparently, she needed some time to think too.

Lissa led her out the door, and my mom looked over at me one more time. She managed to give me a small smile, and I gave her one back too. Then they headed down to the elevator. Lissa gave me a small wave before the elevator doors closed.

As soon as they started to leave, Dimitri looked at me and then glanced down to the paper taking a seat next to the bed besides me. I slowly lowered myself one my bed again. My body was beginning to hurt and my eyes winced a little as I slowly moved down so my head could fit comfortably on the pillow.

"Are you okay, do you need me to help?"

I nodded my head no, and he didn't look convinced, but he didn't attempt to help me this time. Maybe he thought that I wanted to be able to do some things by myself. I was glad he let me. I needed to get accustomed to moving by body again. It was still feeling a little alien to me and like I didn't belong in it yet.

"You don't have to read this out loud," he paused," But I just wanted to let you know that I'm thankful for all the things you did for me while I was in my coma. I deeply appreciate it. You said you taped Lissa's whole wedding for me, and that's something I'll never be able to forget. That means so much to be, you have no idea. My whole life Lissa has felt like a sister to me, so when you told me she got married before, I was devastated to hear I couldn't be there for her. Now, I have the chance to see it, and pretend like I was there." He finished reading my note and didn't say anything for a few moments. It seemed like he was thinking of the right words to say.

"You're welcome, Roza. I knew you'd want to see it, and that's why I did it. I know you. I know what you're like, how you feel, and I know what's important to you. I care about making you happy." He called me Roza again. I liked it when he called me that. Even if he had only called me it twice, I repeated it over and over in my head. It was the same as when he said it. I didn't do it justice.

He stood up, and sat near the corner of the bed. He reached out to grab my hand, and hesitated for a second. He looked over to me and searched my eyes like he was asking me if it was okay. I gave him a small smile and he took that as a yes. Then he did something I didn't expect, and this time he didn't ask me for my permission. He bent down and kissed the top of my head.

"I love you," he whispered into my hair," And I hope someday you'll be able to love me again, too."

I felt him pull back and a deep shudder traveled down my spine.


	5. Chapter 5: Body Heat

Disclaimer: Vampire Academy is not my storyline…not even one bit. I merely own this plot.

A/N: I absolutely loved that ending of the last chapter I wrote. I think it's my favorite so far. Thanks for reading as always. I love writing romance stories 3 =]

Chapter 5: Body Heat

Shortly after Dimitri and I had our discussion, the doctor came in followed behind by a few nurses. He was just as shocked as Dimitri was that I had even woken up. He even drove forty-five miles to see my condition.

"This is one of those medical miracles. I hate to admit it, but I personally thought you'd be in a comatose state for the rest of your life. Sometimes, though, things like this surprise you and you can't figure out why. When I checked your vitals yesterday, you didn't show any signs of regaining consciousness or coming out of it. Can you ever predict a patient's diagnosis though? No, you can't. You have your assumptions, but it's usually the patient's mind, and body that decides it's fate in these cases," the doctor reported to us.

"So Rose coming out of her coma is something that wasn't expected at all? It's not something you or the nurses thought was going to happen?" Dimitri was having a hard time understanding this and so was I. Something must have broke me out of it. The doctor said it's usually the patient's will that allows them to wake up, but I kept feeling like it was something else. It felt like someone had helped me wake up and break out of the coma.

"I'll be honest, no, just like I told you, I didn't expect or foresee that this was going to happen. I didn't think it would happen at all. It's not something I usually tell my patients or my patient's spouses, but I did think Rose would have been in a coma for the remainder of her life. Her head and brain injuries were that severe, I didn't see it happening. When you brought her in here, I thought her brain damages were going to kill her that night. She has surpassed all of our expectations of her. In other words, she is a miracle case."

"I have another question, doctor. After she woke up from the coma, she had lost all of her memories, specifically the last five years. She remembers everything before that, just not anything relating to our life together, or her being married. Is there a chance she'll regain those memories?" Dimitri looked over at me, then looked back at the doctor.

"There is always the possibility that she could regain her memories," the doctor was writing something down," But there is a higher possibility that she will never regain them. She sustained major injuries to her brain, I'm not surprised that she lost some of her short term memories. Usually, when this happens, you do have trouble with your short term memory, and can remember things vividly with your long term. In the future, she may have trouble remembering things short term too. It'll have be something we check on, and see what happens." The doctor was coming to the front of the bed to check my leg strength

"So you're telling me that she might never remember anything for the last five years?" Dimitri looked a little taken back and annoyed at the same time

"I'm afraid to say we don't know yet. It'll have to be one of those things that'll either come to her or it won't. It'll also be something neither you or I can predict." The doctor was helping me sit up and pull the covers down to begin some of the testing he wanted to get done for the night.

I wished it was something we had checked in the morning because I was feeling exhausted more so after those news from him and after all the interaction I had had with Lissa, my mom, and Dimitri. I just needed some rest for the night, even if it was only a few hours. It was already four-thirty in the morning. Time was passing so slowly and yet quickly at the same time.

After the doctor had checked my leg strength, my arms, eyes, and everything else routine, he decided he was going to leave for the night and commence the check-up in the morning. He wanted me to have an MRI done, and a brain scan done to see the progress of my brain and how it was healing.

"In the morning, I'll ask him why you haven't been able to speak yet. We might have to have some more tests than what he suggested done. I'm worried something is wrong, Rose." Dimitri really did look worried. I was afraid what would happen if there was something severely wrong too.

Dimitri helped me lay back down and pull the covers up right as my mom and Lissa were coming back up the elevator each with a cup of liquid which I assumed was coffee in their hand. Lissa's phone began to ring and she answered it right away. It was probably Christian asking how things were going at the hospital.

"Hi, Christian. Yeah, I'm still at the hospital. Things are okay right now, but I'll have to explain more when I get home. I'll be home when Rose doesn't need me here anymore tonight. I don't know when that'll be, and I know you'll be getting ready for work soon. You might not see me until you get home from work. Did you just wake up? I'm sorry I still wasn't there. Yes, you'll have to come meet her soon. I know she'll want to meet you soon too. If I'm not home by the time you leave for work, I'll call you there and let you know I got home safely. I love you too. Bye." Lissa was smiling all throughout that phone and even after she hung up the phone. She was right, I really couldn't wait to meet him. It seemed like he made her so happy and feel so loved. That was something that made me really happy to see.

"Now if I could only sort out me and Dimitri's situation," I thought to myself as I sighed. I glanced over at Dimitri while he was saying something to my mom. He didn't notice, so I watched him. I was taking in and observing his features. He really was attractive. His jaw was chiseled, and strong with a little facial hair on there. His brown hair was tied back in a ponytail with a few pieces that were falling out on the sides. The sides of his mouth were upturned just a little bit while he was talking to my mom and he was moving his hands to motion as he talked. His face looked tired with some small dark circles under his eyes, but he still managed to look strong, kind, and trusting. Lissa was looking from me to him when she caught me staring with a huge, wicked smile on her face. I saw her smiling, so I ushered her to come over to me, and I poked her as hard as I could.

"Hey! What was that for?!" Lissa said with mock amusement. She knew what I was poking her for, and my mom and Dimitri quit talking to see what was going on.

"You two….what are we going to do with you," my mom said shaking her head," It reminds me of when you two wee younger and you were constantly fighting with his other like little kids, and yet you were inseparable." It was just like old times and nothing had changed.

"We really were inseparable weren't we?" Lissa giggled at that and I smiled at her too and nodded.

"When I first met Rose, Lissa and her were together at the night barbeque one of my friends was having. They were laughing together, and whispering things in each other's ears. One of my friends thought they looked like trouble," Dimitri said as he looked up to the ceiling," When my friend wanted to go over there, I hesitated, and told him that it was a bad idea, and I thought I knew what was going to happen. So he went over there with another one of our friends instead. It turns out, I was right. Rose was over there cursing at them and told them to back off. She was so confrontational and feisty, I decided I would try talking to her later."

"This is a good story, you'll want to hear this one," Lissa lightly nudged me in the shoulder with her hand.

"You're right, Lissa, this is a good story. It has a funny ending too," Dimitri continued on," Every so often later in the night, I kept trying to keep track of where Rose was. I wanted to make sure she didn't leave before I had a chance to talk to her. She was one of those girls that was beautiful, but has a blunt, sassy mouth that make guys afraid of them. That just made me want to get to know her even more. So later on in the night just as I thought she was leaving, I walked over to her. After a few minutes of talking to her, she put me in my place, and then gave me her number. I was so surprised that she gave it to me that as I was leaving, I tripped and fell over the steps I was walking down. Needless to say, my friend made fun of me for that for a long time after that. I'm glad she didn't see me trip, I would have looked less cool." Dimitri finished the story, and I smiled at him.

He didn't think he'd be cool? I didn't think there was any way he would be able to be embarrassed, especially so easily like that.

Lissa and my mom each started laughing about the end of the story. Apparently, it was one of the stories from when we started dating that Dimitri didn't like to tell very often.

"Anyways, ladies, I think it's time for you to leave tonight. It's getting late, and Rose is starting to look really tired. She's had a long night, and just woke up a few hours ago. We can all see her again in the morning."

After he said that, I realized that I was feeling tired. I was surprised that I didn't fall asleep a long time ago. He just knew. It must have been all the excitement of everything that I was forgetting that I was really tired not too long ago and my body was aching. I also was curious if he was going to stay with me, or if he was going to leave, too.

"I guess you're right, Dimitri," my mom said as she began to stand up again," We can see her again tomorrow. She needs some rest. I love you, baby. I'm glad you're back here with us. That makes me so happy and relieved. I thought I lost you, too." My mom came over to the bed, bent down and gave me a quick kiss to the forehead and hugged me. She waited over by the door for Lissa while she said good night to me.

Lissa walked over to my bed too and quickly gave me another strong hug, "Night, Rose. I'm really glad you're awake and you're back. We still have so much more to catch up on and you need to meet Christian. I can't wait for that. I've missed you so much. Good night, Dimitri. We'll see you both tomorrow."

Dimitri gave Lissa a small nod, and waved back to her when she started to wave on her way to the elevator with my mom. I gave her a small wave too, and then Dimitri and me were left alone again.

I had gotten used to it though. It didn't make me as uncomfortable as it did the first time when I woke up. I was starting to feel normal and relaxed in his prescience to some extent. I just couldn't get over how sometimes he would stare at me when I wasn't looking. He always had this serious look on his face that seemed to burn straight into me. It made my face feel hot, and it kind of made my body tingle and radiate heat. It felt like his eyes were burning a hole in me and that he could see straight through me. I sometimes even wondered if he knew what I was thinking because I couldn't talk back to him.

"I just wanted to let you know that I'll be spending the night here tonight. Your mom asked them before she came back in the room. They told her it was okay because you just woke up and are probably uncomfortable right now with your surroundings. So if you need anything, Roza, I'll be here will you." I nodded my head to tell him I understood. He nodded his head, too, in return. I felt relieved that he said he was going to stay.

I didn't want to be by myself, and for some reason, something told me inside that I didn't have to worry about trusting him.


End file.
